Comments for How To Save a Marriage | Get Free Marriage Advice Today

Comment on My Spouse Told Me I Love You, But I’m Not in Love With You Anymore. Is this Permanent? by dee

dee — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 18:52:15 +0000

Your CommentsMy spouse said these things but he already had the other woman lined up on the side, he also has had affairs for years unknown to me. He is also into his ego and said I don’t stroke his ego enough. All of these woman are 15 years younger than him and some even work for him. He now states he is “in love” with the currant one. Our mediation was Thursday.

Comment on My Spouse Wants a Divorce and Says Our Kids Will Be fine. What Are The Effects of Divorce On Children? by Larry Bilotta

Larry Bilotta — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 14:34:12 +0000

Hi Renee, it sounds like you are married to a Chaos Kid. I suggest your read my response to someone else with a similar question: http://youcansavethismarriage.com/blog/687/husband-is-a-chaos-kid/

But in short, if you want him to come home, you need to remember to:

1) Don’t put pressure on him
2) Stay calm under all conditions

You need to be sure to do all you can to protect your son no matter what, but it is pressure and negative emotions that drives a spouse away from you.

Focus on these two things, and depending how severe a Chaos Kid he is, you may see some progress just by following these 2 simple rules.

Thanks for your question,

- Larry

Comment on My Spouse Wants a Divorce and Says Our Kids Will Be fine. What Are The Effects of Divorce On Children? by Renee

Renee — Thu, 01 Dec 2011 19:21:41 +0000

I am now a single parent. Me and my husband are still married but in the past month has went from h is mothers house to his mistress’s place of residence and has sense moved in with her. And only in the past two weeks he has even attempted to ask to see his son. Which until there is paper work i don’t feel comfortable. I love my husband but until he is away from this very destructive woman, i fear for both my son and husbands safety. Any suggestions as to how i can get him to come home?

Comment on Discover The REAL Cause Of Marriage Problems by Larry Bilotta

Larry Bilotta — Tue, 29 Nov 2011 05:30:04 +0000

Brian,

Your wife would not want to speak to you or be friends if she were past the Snap line. A woman who has reached that point does not waffle back and forth, and is no longer recognizable as the woman you married.

She has completely checked out and eliminated you from her life completely when she has reached the Snap line.

You want to be careful not to push her there however by not putting pressure on her and keeping yourself calm. Those are the most important things you need to focus on to avoid pushing her over the edge.

Thanks for your question Brian.

- Larry

Comment on Discover The REAL Cause Of Marriage Problems by Brian Daly

Brian Daly — Sun, 20 Nov 2011 20:17:28 +0000

Larry

I’m not sure if my wife has passed the Snap line. How do I know if she has or not? She still speaks to me and wants to be friends, but nothing else. She is also a severe chaos kid who was abused and has bulimia. we have been married for 18 years but she had an emotional affair this year and I think I over reacted.

Thanks
Brian

Comment on How Do you Fix your Marriage Problems when your Spouse Won’t Speak to You? by Larry Bilotta

Larry Bilotta — Fri, 18 Nov 2011 23:29:18 +0000

Hi Krys,

Fighting for what’s yours is only going to create more pressure. You want to avoid putting any pressure on your spouse and avoid exposing your spouse to any negative feelings on your part.

So you have two jobs.

Job 1) No pressure
Job 2) No negative feelings

You can read my 7 Secrets mini course to help you with job 2.

- Larry

Comment on How Do you Fix your Marriage Problems when your Spouse Won’t Speak to You? by Krys

Krys — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 20:33:11 +0000

Hi Larry,
Im not quite sure if im going about anything right, do i back off and wait or do I fight for whats mine. I Know things will never be quite the same but i can only hope in the mean time…

Comment on My Spouse Told Me I Love You, But I’m Not in Love With You Anymore. Is this Permanent? by Eduardo

Eduardo — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 02:10:42 +0000

My wife told me that she loves me, but she is not in love with me anymore. She said that she felt this way since the kids were born, the oldest is 21 and the youngest is 13. She told me this 2 years ago and said to give her a year of in house separation. I tried to show her that I really love her by words, cards, flowers and trying to share more time with her by going out on dates. But she told me not to try so hard, and I felt more rejected so I stopped trying and gave her her space. Then one night she became intimate with me for a few months, and after that I thought things got well, she told me that she is still not in love with me. She wants to continue the in house separation, sleeping separate in the same bed due to our financial dept to live in separate homes. She said that we can live like this until we get out of dept that might take 6 to 9 months, then maybe divorce. She comes from a troubled home where her father was controlling, strick and harsh. My parents always argued, my dad is always negative, they divorced when I was in.high school. they remarried after 15 years.

Comment on My husband and I have been married for 27 years. He says he “hates sex”. by Anna

Anna — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 17:49:13 +0000

My hasband and I have been married 40 plus years and hadn’t had sex or any kind of intimacy in almost 30 years. He said I was boring, a prude and just lousy in the sex department. He just hates sex!! IN all other cases he a great guy, I want for nothig.

Comment on Stuck In An Unhappy Marriage? Discover Your Spouses’ REAL Motives by Larry Bilotta

Larry Bilotta — Mon, 10 Oct 2011 13:25:22 +0000

Claude,

You are living proof that we only learned in pain. And it appears that you have been through a lot of it. Since you write really well, maybe you should write a book so people can learn through your painful discoveries.

Larry